Fandom is my inspiration

July 7, 2012

While the Sword of Truth books that inspired The Legend of the Seeker are known for their humorlessness, there is definitely a fluffy side to fandom. But there is serious inspiration too, and a dark side to the sentimental self-indulgence fan art often represents.

Listen for the lyrics hinting at the bittersweet intensity of a shared experience that, for fans, can seem especially one-sided.

But it is futile to call on actors to seek out Rome. Theirs are not those parts, and even fans need to remember it. Mostly they’re just sentimental when they get scared.

“Small things can pit the memory like a cyst:
Having seen other fathers greet their sons,
I put my childish face up to be kissed
After an absence. The rebuff still stuns”

– James McAuley, Because

The blueness of a night, as warning against what can be ascertained by that light, is not prone to “silver glass” treatment in the off screen life of the mind, but in the fan video above, there is an impression of other things more true to life.

In Angela Greene’s depiction of this sort of night, one sees the effect of blue air, agitating darkly, “to loose and grab at the moon.” A woman cries twice,

“but the third call becomes
a frail and exotic sound –
some primitive bird’s perhaps?”

The backdrop in the “object” below greets movement with a like apprehension, from a real tendency to mistake such a night for a portent – specific to the wanderer, a queer feeling that alertness is needed even if dreamtime upholds and seems to hold it in suspension.

joseph_cornell_abeilles

The night kind of unusual blueness, when the air is clear and the lack of greater darkness alarming in open woods on slight hills, can almost be heard in the instrumental Blue as the Turquoise Night of Neyshabur as well.

Fan art rarely holds my attention apart from vidding, but in fan videos the sentimental mirror creates a display, if not art of its own kind, that can showcase a response and ascertainment of one viewing of certain film moments that itself can speak to the fan’s experience of diaspora in the imagination, far from the interior of a subject but in that sense far from home.

Read this way, the video above raises a rhetorical question that can be answered with another.

It’s easy to wish a reprieve toward those actors who have already shown their hearts to the mob. Anyone’s time may yet come, and work done is known to fans by being done as well as it will be, and already in hand.

“Cruelty has a Human Heart,
And Jealousy a Human Face;
Terror the Human Form Divine,
And Secrecy the Human Dress.”

– William Blake, The Divine Image

So they have our love, and our answer. We want to hear from them again, but not because we have not heard them say what they mean and known that we already agree. Somehow, we already have something in common with those whose names we learn at all.

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